You’re a Sexy Beast If You’re Reading This. No. I swear.

Which…you are. Reading this, I mean. Ergo, You Are A a sexy BEAST. (muahaha) Oh, don’t shy away now. I’ve flattered you with my uncanny choice of adjectives and weird capitalization of the wrong words & there’s no turning back. You know it. I know it. … So, it is December 2nd. I can no longer yell in all caps HAPPY DECEMBER 1ST!! I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I’ve got like pi-polar hormones. My conscious, like, the one speaking this in my head and concurrently being able to type it out, is completely bland. Like that Zooey Deschanel person whenever her voice penetrates robotically through a small TV speaker>> .

But, on the outside…I’m in the mood. For, like, Christmas, I mean. It’s all around us, man. It’s December. And props to those of you who celebrate Chrismukkah because you are of mixed heritage. Like Seth from that show O.C. >>(mmm..brings back memories. Seth had the most adorable lisp.)

DECEMBER! When all sixty-seven and a half of those resolutions on that list finally pull together like that stupid purple afghan you’ve been knitting for the past five years>> to where you are actually riveted with inspiration to finish them. There’s a pulsing adrenaline and energy in every dead bud on the side of the road, in every heated car stuck in traffic, in every waft of cold air that Nyquils down your throat and makes you inhale that much deeper whenever the heat gets to be too much and you roll down your window in a suffocated frenzy, this, my friends, is that time of year. Speaking of that time a year, there has been a butt-load of frenzy going on in

London Town>>

the city of FASHION and stick figured quote/unquote “hotties” this week, it’s all a buzz…Yes, due to the British Fashion Awards. And this is your bipartisan review. Well, supposedly. I might get bored and curl up in my imaginary purple afghan and watch with awe at the way Merideth’s skin glows imperceptibly on Who Wants to be a Millionaire…

So, it was surprisingly held in Britain and was sponsored up by Swarovski (they make nice crystals), and was said to be a rather stellar tea party of an event, if I do say so myself, with 500+ celebrity guests (pff) and a whole slew of the industry insiders of the glamorous Milan-parking fashionistas from across the globe itself. Christian slater even showed up. Hmmm…

But most importantly, is the fashion. The clothes. The threads!! (You saw it coming, or you should have been prepared.) Among my favorites is the designs of lovely 2008 winner Luella Bartely, who is a divine thing and makes what she feels like in a soft array of translucent rainbow skittles colors and doesn’t mind pairing a hot pink cocktail dress (that appears to be too big for its model) with these Chinese boat shaped bug slippers! >>

Heavenly!

Ugh…Guys, to be honest, I think the only cool thing about this event was the weirdos who showed up to the after party. Everyone likes a nice look at an after party. The lights…>>Ok, I just researched the After Party. And I have no idea who any of those people are. But, the red carpet! Maybe there’s something there!! … No. Just your usual assortment of guests. >>

Well, its been one heck of a week for fashion people. That being said, there is nil to report. I still like the flavor of the beginning of this post, though. So, we won’t give up on it all together.

*And, by the by, that thing I said about Zooey Deschanel’s voice being robotic, like a displaced vibrator, a man, even, well, its really not fair. Truth isn’t fair. But, it’s really not that fair, considering the picture I paired with the comment for the mere sake of comic flow. So, I have also posted a much more flattering picture of Miss Deschanel in a beautiful Angel light hearted gothic bodice, which is not frumpy or robotic in any sense, giving homage to the Indie Film Princesses other talents. Posing. Not talking. Simply flattering.

Now where can I get one of those…??

And, look, here she is again in the latest Jim Carey movie about a guy who says yes all the time. I think she’s the one on the left playing Hermione Granger from Harry Potter in some sort of cosplay Americana. And, more than likely, quite well. *yawn*>>